I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
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