eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
