Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Randomize
