If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
