he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize