and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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