You can't special order awesome
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Randomize
