I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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