I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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