It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
he was CRYING into my vagina
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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