I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
