Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
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