Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
