We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
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