he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
