if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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