How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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