that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
