Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
there is glitter all over my balls
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
