school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
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