Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
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