Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Randomize
