what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
