So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Your cock deserves a montage
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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