My Higher Power is John Stamos
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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