i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Randomize
