We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
You're a waste of cheezeits
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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