need another drink. this is the easiest way
there's paper in my vomit.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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