My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize