um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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