he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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