I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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