mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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