As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
