gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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