I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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