I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
they call him Oral-B. enough said
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize