she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
