Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
