Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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