There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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