Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Randomize
