my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
the room spins SO much faster in panama
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
