I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
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