idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize
