somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
this just has baby written all over it
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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