The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
