whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Randomize
