My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
