Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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