Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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