I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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