marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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