Tell her she can't have a vagina
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
